


Hopeless Homo Club

by benkrupy



Category: Persona 5
Genre: F/F, M/M, but also a LOT of phantom thieves fooling around, lots of pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:01:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23808817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/benkrupy/pseuds/benkrupy
Summary: Ryuji admits to liking Akira, but right as he's about to confess, Goro Akechi comes into the picture and seemingly charms the socks off of Akira before he gets the chance.While this is happening, Ann realises she likes girls. And she REALLY likes Makoto. But every time she talks to her, she can barely speak without being sent into a panic.(OR: Ryuji and Ann are hopeless gays and try to confess to their crushes)
Relationships: Kurusu Akira/Sakamoto Ryuji, Niijima Makoto/Takamaki Ann
Comments: 11
Kudos: 69





	1. Uno!

“C’mon Ann, there’s no WAY that counts as a valid move.” Ryuji frowned at the pile of cards in front of him, which just had three 2+ cards placed upon it.

“Um, house rules remember? I thought we agreed on this beforehand,” Ann stuck out her tongue, “Time to pick up six!”

Ryuji sighed and did as told, followed by a scowl as Ann called Uno.

This was an average Friday night for the two of them, all night Uno tournaments and clowning about. Ann’s parents were rarely around, and there was something about the emptiness of the house that she couldn’t stand. So whenever her parents were away, she slept at Ryuji’s. Under normal circumstances these boy-girl sleepovers would be seen as complete taboo, but the pair went back to middle school, and Ryuji’s mom seemed to realise nothing romantic would ever bloom between them. Good on Ms Sakamoto.

“It’s not MY fault you’re bad at Uno.” She said jokingly, proceeding to watch his next move carefully. Ann loved nights like these. She felt at home in the Sakamoto household, and unlike in her own home, she felt like she mattered.

She placed down her last card, “YEEEESSS! I win!” She raised her arms up and did a little victory dance.

Ryuji scowled and started reshuffling the cards, “Well done, I guess. But don’t think you’ll win next time, I’ll have my best game on and then you’ll be sorry.”

“Oh yeah? How are you gonna get game in three minutes?” Ann grinned as the cards were handed out, “Prepare to lose, Ryuji.”

\---

They were now halfway through the game, and neither of them were clearly beating the other. Ann was focusing on what card to play next when Ryuji spoke, “Hey Ann, can I ask you something?”

Ann smirked. His distraction techniques were not going to work on her, she knew better than to fall for something as dumb as that. But when she looked up, she realised it wasn’t a distraction technique at all. Ryuji seemed almost nervous, definitely not the laidback friend she was used to. Concern flooded her mind instantly. 

“Yeah of course, what’s up?” She put down her cards, Uno could wait.

“Well have you ever, yknow…” He trailed off, uncertain. Whatever he had to say, it had to be serious, Ryuji wasn’t the sort of guy to have a filter when he spoke, and whatever he had to say now, he was struggling. 

“Hey, you ok?” Ann shifted over to him, eyes wide with concern, “You can tell me anything, I swear I won’t judge.”

Ryuji grimaced, fingers fidgeting in his lap, “Well, it’s kinda important you get me? But I don’t want it to like, affect anything, y’know?” He made a gesture between the two of them.

Ann didn’t know. In fact, she was really worried about Ryuji, he never talked like this. She opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted, “I mean like, it shouldn't affect anything. But I just want things to stay the same y'know?”

She nodded. Even if she didn’t understand what Ryuji was talking about, she understood the concept of being too scared to speak up. It was horrible. 

“Okay, I’m gonna tell you. But you have to promise we’ll stay good okay?”

“Of course.” And Ann meant it. She didn’t care if Ryuji happened to be an axe murderer, she would support him nonetheless. 

“Well, I think I have a crush.”

Relief flooded Ann’s body and she almost laughed out loud. A crush? She had expected something much worse, like a deadly illness or something. But a crush? Ryuji could be so overdramatic sometimes, she loved him regardless though. 

She grinned widely and said, “Who? Ohmygod I NEED to know! Is she cute?”

“He.”

“Huh?”

“You said is “she” cute. But you mean he. Is he cute.”

Ohh. Now she understood the panic. But it was misplaced, he should know Ann wouldn’t care. I mean, this was the guy who’d seen her at her worst, it would be dumb to get so upset over who he liked. Plus, she knew Ryuji, and he must really like the guy if he was openly confessing like this.

“Ryuji, you know I don’t care if you’re gay right?”

He looked up with hopeful eyes, “Really? Because y’know it’s not exactly considered normal. Which I know is bull, but still. But I really do like guys, Ann. Like yeah, women are hot I guess. But they’re not attractive in that way. I don’t know if this even makes sense but yeah, I’m gay.”

Ann pulled Ryuji into a hug,” I am so so proud of you!! But you know I wouldn’t’ve cared right? There’s no way I could hate you, plus you could expose all my secrets right away.” She giggled at the last part, and he smiled back.

“So you really don’t care?” He looked slightly nervous behind his smile, and lowered his head a little, almost as if he was afraid someone was going to hit him. 

She hugged him harder, “Of course not, silly!” 

She pulled back, “Okay, now tell me who it is. I wanna know all about them.” 

Ryuji reddened, “Well, it’s embarrassing.” 

Well, he has to tell her now, she was intrigued. But why was he so embarrassed? Is it because she knew the guy? She was about to ask him this when he abruptly interrupted her, “It’s Akira, okay?”

Akira? Akira. “Oh my God.” Ann started to giggle.

“Hey, don’t laugh at me! It’s not funny!”

But she couldn’t help it. How had she not noticed before? It was so blatantly obvious, and yet, she hadn’t even begun to suspect it. Now that she thought about it though, it would be cute. Very cute. Ryuji was so affectionate towards Akira, and Ann knew he would go out of his way to do little things for him like he did for her sometimes. She also knew that Akira loved spending time with Ryuji. Obviously she didn’t know all the details, Ann wasn’t nearly as close with him as she was with Ryuji, but she knew enough to know they’d be a really cute couple.

“You should ask him out,” she suggested. And why not? They’d be cute together, it was clear as day.

Ryuji’s already red face turned a bright crimson, “Ya think so? Because I don’t even know if he’d say yes y’know? And if he said no I don’t think I could stand to see him again, which would ruin the group.”

“He would not say no. Have you ever seen the way you two act around each other? He definitely likes you.”

“You think so?” Ryuji looked like he just won the lottery, “Okay, maybe I’ll ask him.”

Ann cheered, “Yeees!”

“That’s only a maybe though, don't expect anything.”

But by the look on his face, Ann knew that maybe was a yes. He was going to ask out Ryuji.


	2. Messages

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guys i am SO SORRY for not updating!! to be honest it’s been a mix of mental health problems, school and just forgetting! 
> 
> i’ll try to be more consistent w/ updating in the future :) 
> 
> also thank you everyone for the kind comments on chapter 1, they made my day to read <3

**RYUJI POV**

Ryuji lay on his bed, checking his phone. Ann had left a few hours ago, and he was too lazy to start his chores yet, so he was essentially just procrastinating. And to be fair, sweeping wasn’t exactly taking precedence in his mind right now. 

_ “Have you ever seen the way you two act around each other? He definitely likes you.”  _

_ “I guess you are as dumb as everyone says, huh. No one would fall for  _ _ you  _ _ of all people, especially not Akira.” _

He shook his head, as if the action would force the thoughts out his head. 

Sure, maybe he wasn’t the sharpest guy in the world, and maybe he was a  _ little _ loud at times, but Akira didn’t seem to hate him at all. In fact, Ryuji got the exact opposite feeling from him. Almost as if…

No. He wouldn’t make assumptions yet, it could only lead to getting let down, and that’s an emotion he wanted to avoid at all costs. 

Sighing, Ryuji flopped up from his bed and shuffled over to the kitchen. The clock on the wall read 9:02 in the morning. Shoot. His mom would be home soon from her night shift to freshen up before her day job, and he still hadn’t swept the flat. Rushing,he downed his ritalin for the day and grabbed the broom, beginning to swipe at the floor with the bristles with a pacey determination. 

Turns out, mindless chores like sweeping are good for thinking. And Ryuji was thinking very hard.

Should he just text Akira and ask him out? No, ask him to  _ hang out. _ That way he’d be able to ask him out in person. Would it even be smart for him to ask him out today? Maybe Ann had told Akira already and he’d become a laughing stock. No, she wouldn’t do that. 

The thought process continued in Ryuji’s head for what seemed like hours - but was more likely just a few minutes - until the floor had been properly swept. 

Now all that was left was to bite the bullet.

Swiping around on his phone, he shot Ann a quick “ _ asking him now”,  _ and before he could wait for her usual response of ALL CAPITALS and a million emojis, he clicked on Akira’s profile and sent out the words, “ _ hey wanna hang out tmrw?” _

It was done. Ryuju sat back in anxious satisfaction, but before he could get too nervous about what to do next, a notification bubble popped up. From Akira.

_ RYUJI: hey wanna hang out tmrw _

_ AKIRA: sorry, I can’t. hanging out with goro.  _

And suddenly, Ryuji’s heart shattered into a million pieces. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaa i need to get back in the habit of writing so sorry if this reads really badly!!! thank u for reading :)

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there!! Hope you liked the first chapter :) 
> 
> I have the whole plot planned out, so I'll definitely be updating soon. Hopefully the characters seem realistic enough!
> 
> (I have a lot of fun stuff planned hehehee)


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